We're Still Here

We're still here. As most of you know Chris was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma Cancer and this week he receives a stem cell transplant. These last few months have felt like years. I feel like I've aged 10 years since the diagnosis. When people tell you Cancer is a family disease, believe them. Our beloved Bella Marie gives us strength.

Love to all.... God grant us strength..

The Dreaded "C"

The Dreaded C

Cancer, the dreaded “C” word,” it’s become such an epidemic in our society that people are loath to even mention its name. Now, it’s become a detour in my husband’s life. Multiple Myeloma like other “C” begins in cells. Myeloma is an incurable but treatable “C” in the blood and bones. Myeloma begins when a plasma cell becomes abnormal. The abnormal cell divides and makes more abnormal cells and over time collects in the bone marrow.

Our Fear Became Reality

At approximately 3:27pm on May 26th at a hospital in Tucson, Arizona two cancer specialists entered my husband’s hospital room. I sensed they knew one another and worked together before. It was almost a scene from Gray’s Anatomy or one of those drama tv shows. They were polite with respecting smiles. The eldest of the two, was Chief of Medicine at the Arizona Cancer Center. The other was a strikingly handsome man with a Russian accent who introduced himself as the oncologist handling my husband’s case. Each grabbed a chair, sat next to Chris’ hospital bed and probed Chris with personal questions regarding his health. I gazed long and hard. I read their names stitched in white, embroidered on the left hand corner of their white lab coats. My gut turned sour and the voice inside my head began to pray. Suddenly, he was thrown into another universe, a new world called “C”. While Chris handled the diagnosis very well, I wanted answers. I was mad as hell, but couldn’t show Chris how I felt.

Moments later they repeated a gloom sentence, “Mr. Martinez it looks like you have multiple myeloma “Cancer”, announced the eldest doctor. Chris remained stoic. His hands lay folded over his chest. Not a tear fell from his cheek. He paid attention to each word and carefully listened to his diagnosis.

In the seconds, after doctors asked, “Do you have questions?” I transitioned from wife to journalist. I inquired about everything with this disease called Multiple Myeloma “C”.
As they repeated my question with their answer, I quickly absorbed each sentence like a sponge, circling key phrases with my pen on my notebook paper. I made a vow to myself. I was determined to live, eat, and breathe this disease.

We Missed The Signs

We think the “C” started last summer. Chris complained of fatigue and aches in his lower back. He slowly lost weight and each month passed with more pain. Bella’s first birthday arrived and with her celebration came the decision to re-visit our life insurance policies. Our agent scheduled standard tests before the policy was written that included a blood and urine analysis.

When the tests returned Chris needed further testing and our agent couldn't insure him because of what the tests showed. Our agent recommended Chris see his primary care physician. “It’s probably nothing. Just return when he everything looks normal,” the agent said.

Chris did see his doctor and tests showed severe dehydration and abnormal protein in his urine. Doctors recommended he drink more liquids and return in a few weeks for a follow-up.

Weeks turned into months and still no change. Month after month his health didn’t improve. He was frail and continued to lose weight. In February, he developed kidney stones and his nephrologist prescribed pain medication to ease discomfort. ,p>

In March, the pain continued. Chris wasn’t able to pass the kidney stones on his own, so the doctor recommended he receive an outpatient procedure called a lithotripsy. A lithotripsy is a medical procedure that uses shock waves to break up stones in the kidneys. After the procedure, the tiny pieces of stones should pass out of the kidneys’ and into the urine. So, Chris attempted to schedule the procedure but was out of luck. The next available appointment was in the middle of April, meaning he would live with the pain a little longer than he anticipated.

The lithotripsy was finally performed, but it was unsuccessful for Chris. Through this entire ordeal Chris had lost 20 pounds and returned home from work, passing out from exhaustion and fatigue each night.

In May, he returned for a follow-up visit. His doctor told him there was nothing more they could do and to re-schedule a follow-up visit in one year. So, Chris moved on. He often thought it was all in his head. Perhaps, he needed more rest. But, in both of your guts we knew something wasn’t right. Finally, I demanded Chris see his primary physician one last time. It was a shot in the dark but we needed some type of solution as to why Chris looked and felt miserable.

His doctor ran the tests and that evening the on-call doctor asked Chris to get to a hospital immediately. He had developed stage 4 kidney failure.

Additional Testing

The road to recovery continues for Chris. Initially, he started all chemo treatments in Arizona. His doctor told us the solution for his disease would be a a stem cell transplant. However, that solution wasn't viable for us. We were told the hospital had several budget cuts and one of them was the specialization of stem cell transplants. Chris would need to go elsewhere in order for him to survive.

We’re Home Honey

While Chris lay in a hospital bed and me on a roll away bed. I researched daily. My laptop and phone near me at all times.

Thankfully, our family and friends in Arizona were there to give us some much needed support. They arrived to the hospital each day listening to our complaints. Even mentoring to both of us, mentioning how God would teach our family a valuable lesson through this trial and suffering. When they would leave it helped us gain courage. Our souls were healthy again. Even if it were just for a few hours.

As I sat in the hospital for two weeks I was determined to get him back to Texas. But, before that could happen Chris would need three types of Chemo. One done intravenously, and the other two given orally at the Arizona Cancer Center.

Chris would also need a doctor to take on his case. That quickly led me to one of the best health facilities in the country, M.D. Anderson in Houston. Long story short they were able to connect with me, instantly taking on his case and immediately setting an appointment with a team of specialists.

What Is A Stem Cell Transplant?

Chris will receive a stem cell transplant beginning this week. The idea behind a stem cell transplant is to destroy “C” cells from his bone marrow with a high dose of chemo. The transplant team will also give him a shot, allowing stems cells to leave the bone marrow and enter the blood stream. A few days later a doctor will draw out enough blood to be used for treatment.

Chris will have his blood cleaned through a dialysis machine, whirled around for four full days until they harvest enough stem cells to freeze. Then the clean blood will be re-introduced into his body through a port, back into the bone marrow, producing healthy blood cells.

Chris will be given a high dose of chemo, instantly killing his white blood cells.

For 8 weeks Chris will stay in Houston. Each week someone will be his caregiver. The first to take the lead is my mom, then Maria, his brother David and then myself. Once the 8 weeks are over without complications, Chris will be in remission. “Remission” will mean Utopia for my husband. It will be the first day of his brand new life- a life without chemotherapy, pills, needles, and sleepless nights.

Right now, as you read this someone is fighting the fight, indeed it might be you trudging chemotherapy.

It’s humbling to know how the hand of God has brought us to where Chris and our family are today. God has taken the worse tragedy in my husband’s life and will turn it into a triumph… this I know is true. Personally, I’ve developed a better relationship with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I’ve gained tremendous respect for doctors and nurses who care for those sick with the dreaded “C”.

What I been most impressed with are the amounts of prayers and love from family, friends, and total strangers. This has been a lonely battle for Chris and each day someone reaches out to him in some way or another. It might be the whisper of prayer or the text to his cell phone reading, “Hang in there.”

The human spirit is powerful and it has kept my husband alive more than you can ever know.  God bless all.



A Thousand Thanks

A Thousand ThanksMother's Day brings to mind
The thousands of things you did for me
that helped make me happier,
stronger and wiser,
because I had you as a role model.I'm grateful for all the times
you healed my hurts
and calmed my fears,
so that I could face the world
feeling safe and secure.I'm thankful for all you showed me
about how to love and give--
lessons that now bring
so many blessings to me
each and every day.Your sacrifices and unselfishness
did not go unnoticed, Mom.
I admire you, I respect you,
I love you.
And I'm so glad you're my mother!Happy Mother's Day! 

 

Eclipse, Get a Sneak Peak

I've read all the books front to back and listened to the audio version of the books from Arizona to Texas twice on my IPOD. Some of my friends, even my family say I'm a nut about the Twilight Saga. I agree. I am. So, while this has nothing to do with our own "BELLA." I'm hoping in the years ahead, Bella will be able to read this blog and get an idea of what her mother enjoyed while being a mommy.

So, whether you are Team Jacob or Team Edward, this new trailer for TWILIGHT: ECLIPSE is blowing everybody's minds.

Not only is it full of the romance of the pending choices Bella has to make, but, of course, there's that underlying tension about the real life romance of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. And, of course, there's Taylor Lautner.

Is this movie going to blow the last one out of the water? The studio certainly seems to be placing these teasers so that fans will be pushing one another into the streets to buy the first tickets when they go on sale.

Four Generations of Women

Our hands in a circle, life symbols…… both perfect and profound.
The women of our family, young and old in love are bound.

We are born into our circle---sweet, delicate dimpled hands.
Loved and held by the generations, the miracle of life we understand.
 

As we move throughout our lives, our hands speak our heart.
Touching, loving, comforting. All God’s work of art.
 

Our hands entwine for games & prayers. They clap with joy and pride.
They tremble with anger and sorrow, soothe broken hearts and babies cries.
 

Our hands shape, guide and teach, nourish, support and share.
At times swift, deft, and purposeful at times imperfect and impaired.
 

We are called home from our circle, a life story engraved on our hands.

Loved and held by the generations, the beauty of life we understand.

Together we share our journeys, the generations both now and then.
The women of our family are a circle of love that never ends.

 

The Easter Egg-periment

Easter was by far my favorite recognized holiday when I was a child.

Traditionally, the festivities would begin at my grandparents home in Hondo,Texas. I would quickly change out of my pajamas and into my grandfather "OPA's" shirt. Then run outside and hunt the eggs the Easter Bunny left for me. 

As an adult at Easter I pay more attention to the birth, life, atonement, death, and ultimately the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

This year was Bella's second Easter and so she attended two "Easter Egg Adventures".

The first of two excursions were held at St. John Church in Hondo and then at Marc and Janet's home.

Bella was remarkable!

She seemed so grown up hunting along with the 5 and 6 year old children, a real tear-jerker for mommy and daddy, who still can't believe God provided us our very own  miracle each day. Bella, I love you my darling.

 

Bubble Girl

Bella loves bubbles. 

Specifically, Mr. Bubbles! We fill the bath tub full of water and Bella picks at each bubble and then throws it in the air, which eventually lands on her head and face. She also likes blowing the bubbles and those usually end up on the floor, which I wipe up with a towel. I don't mind though, Bella enjoys herself and if she has fun and learns at the same time then its alright with Mommy and Daddy!

 

Spring Time in Texas

Spring time in Texas is magnificent. The countryside is blooming with wildflowers, just in time for Bella to enjoy the ranch during Spring Break. My parents kept her all week long and while she was there she picked up a few phrases and words:  "What is It?"  "Up." and "Papa." to name a few. 

Each morning she had malt o' meal for breakfast and in the afternoon Shi Shi would take her into town or go outside and play. When Popi would get home they would eat dinner and make their way outside to work in the garden.   


Bella really enjoyed the time spent with them. However, I think Popi and Shi Shi enjoyed it more.

Dancin' Queen

A few weekends ago we went to Maw Maw's house in Fort Stockton, Texas. Bella and my mom played the piano and in between song's Bella would get down from sitting near the piano and burst out with some cool dance moves!

What To Do-What To Do

This age is by far the best-- Yep, at 18 months, our little Bella is engaged in so many activities. The tiny sparkles in her eyes learning and observing life's smallest creatures brings delight to our family. Each day Bella is fascinated with what life will bring. 

I wish I had more time to blog all about Bella's little adventures. Lately, I come home from work and let out a great big sigh of relief as my life at work keeps me busy or 
also known as: occupied, employed, unavailable, assiduous, not to mention exhausted! 


But, we get through it day in and day out. 


Hopefully, Chris will find employment in Texas soon. We sure miss Daddy. Lately, I've taken Bella on a few excursions. 


A few weekend's ago we went to George West and visited with old friends. We also went to the San Antonio Stock Show and Rodeo. During the work week we watched cousin Matthew's basketball game and if that wasn't enough we celebrated cousin Caroline's 2nd birthday party at Peter Piper Pizza. 

Of course, we always spend time with Nana in San Antonio as well as the ranch at Shi Shi and Popi's in Uvalde--- It's amazing to see the interaction with Bella and her grandparents. 

It gives me a nice warm fuzzy inside. 
 

18 Months

Bella's Favorite Things at 18 Months:

•  Coloring with Mommy before bedtime
•  Picking flowers on the ranch
•  Watching Daddy thru Skype
•  Bubble Baths
•  Tortilla's
•  Saying the number "8" and "9"

Favorite Things

Bella's favorite things at 16 months:

• Mrs. Lucy's cooking
• Playing with Melanie and Alexis during the week
• Riding in her toy car she got for Christmas from Aunt Ala and Becki
• Watching Dora
• Drinking Iced Tea from Popi's glass
• Sitting in her polk-a-dot chair like a big girl
• Coloring
• Long ranch rides with Shi Shi & Popi
• Brushing her teeth
• Putting puzzles together